I’ll let you in on a little secret: I’m terrified.

Specifically, I’m terrified that:

  1. I’m not good enough.
  2. Someone’s going to find out.

You feel the same way?

[awkward]

Well, now that we’ve gotten that out of the way…

To be honest,

The Year of Not Waiting isn’t going so well.  I spent a big chunk of today checking twitter so I could avoid doing a job I was afraid to start.

Finally, I went looking for a little courage via instant message and my friend Michael. Here’s how it went:

Me: I feel so unworthy of writing this.
Michael: you are worthy
Me: I actually think I should go get a job as a waitress.  Or a truck driver.
Michael: really? I think you should stand up, look in the mirror, and say “That was a fucking stupid thing I just said…let me not say that again.”

Laughing, crisis averted, I turned back to my pesky Word document and finished the job.

My point is,

Everybody feels this way sometimes, especially when things are changing.  It’s okay to be terrified.  It’s even okay to stop and get your bearings.

You have to stop so you can go.

Which reminds me, watch this: